November 22, 2010

Bella's having a giveaway!

Hello folks, nice to see you again!

Bella over at Memoirs of a Crazy Witch is having her first giveaway! It's a 55 dollar gift code to use at any of the many CSN stores websites, there's lots to look over, so get on over to her blog if you haven't already, and check it out! While you're there, don't forget to become a follower, she's an amazing writer and a wonderful person. I thoroughly enjoy reading her posts, and I know you will too. So, what are you waiting for? Click that link up there and get going!

Stay tuned for a review of a CSN product, I am ordering it today, so it's only going to be a few weeks until I do it, talk to everyone soon!

October 19, 2010

And now, I can shop online.....

Hi folks, good to see you again!

Now as I told you in my last post, a lot has changed in the 6 months since I started working again, and one of them is that I now have money to use to shop and buy things online.

One thing I do a lot is to buy Facebook credits to use in various games, such as Happy Pets. While the games are fun without having to spend real money, they're a lot more fun when you have the capital to buy things from the games' store. There are some games that have their own form of currency, such as in Pet Society where they use "Playfish Cash" (because Playfish is the name of the company that makes the game), and in Frontierville they use what's called "Horseshoes" (basically because the symbol of the "cash" is a horseshoe). All of them are used in the same way, wherein you buy the credits or cash or horseshoes with your bank card or credit card, and then you are able to spend them in the game to buy the various items you want or need to further your progress within that game. I played a lot of games on Facebook before I got a job, but I'm having more fun playing them now that I have one.

The other thing I've done since getting a job is to shop for and buy products online through various websites. One of  my favorite websites to peruse before I started working was, a place for everything related to computer hardware. I used to drool over processors, hard drives, motherboards, you name it, and now I'm able to buy them should I so desire, it's a good feeling.

There is another site, or should I say sites, that I have recently become aware of, where you can buy almost anything under the sun, and that's the CSN Stores family of websites. They sell everything from air compressors to barstools to car seats to desks to fitness equipment, I mean they have it all. You can buy briefcases, shoes, toys, even pet furniture, it's really a one stop shopping site. Their prices are very competitive, and in the near future I am going to do a review of one of their products here on my blog, so be sure to look out for that.

That's just a few things I'm doing now that I'm working. In my next post, find out about the game called "Magic", it's a little unusual, but interesting at the same time........

October 18, 2010

6 months later.......

Hello folks, nice to see you again!

It's hard to believe I haven't posted here in 6 months, it seems once I got my job I started posting in my other blog and left this one to just sit. Well now's as good a time as any to update you on the happenings.

I've been working at Walmart for 6 months now, and I've made some friends, and gotten used to walking 10 miles a night. I've just recently clocked it with a pedometer, it's really 10 MILES that I walk a night doing the floor maintenance!

We first sweep the floor, each man doing a section of the store with those long dust mops you may have seen if you're ever in Walmart late at night, and then we each have a separate job to do. One guy is the "scrubber", and runs the scrubbing machine that cleans the floor, another guy is the "buffer", and runs the buffing machine after the scrubber has scrubbed the floor, and then there is the "side jobs" guy, who does various other tasks such as vacuuming carpets, cleaning the break room and offices, and sweeping and scrubbing in the receiving areas in the back of the store. He's also the guy that cleans the bathrooms if there isn't a fourth person to do that, which on occasion, there isn't. Oh and there's also a guy that does waxing of one or more aisles most nights, as there is usually SOMETHING that needs a new coat of wax on such a gargantuan floor.

Anyway I've been trained on all the jobs and have gotten pretty proficient at them (all except the waxing, haven't done that one much), and I enjoy what I do, but I've also learned that there aren't any opportunities for advancement within the company if one stays with the maintenance crew. We have no managerial staff, and therefore answer directly to the co-manager of the store that is in charge on any given night. This means that in order to find an opportunity to advance, I will need to move to a different department, and the only other one available on third shift is among the stock crew. I have had a few chances to try my hand at moving freight, in hardware and in housewares, and I like it, and I hope I get the chance to do it again, and eventually move over to one of those departments on a permanent basis. It should provide me with the possibility of moving into a management position, and on third shift, it's not hard to do, as most of the crew seems content to stay where they are.

That's about all for now, but I'll be back soon to write again, I've been away for far too long, and a lot has changed in the time I've been gone.

April 10, 2010

Update, and a rant

Hi folks, thanks for stopping by!

Well, I'm done with orientation and "training", and I start tomorrow night actually doing my job. I'd like to say that for all the bad reputation Walmart has as a company, it sure seems to me that they really care about their employees. I could be wrong, but the policies they have, especially those on recycling, in my opinion, are unmatched by any other corporation. This might be a company I'd like to make a career out of. I'm not getting any younger, and I need a company like this where there are real opportunities for advancement. My mother thinks I should still be looking for a better job. With all due respect Mom, this is my life, and I'm going to live it my way. I have had enough of listening to others' advice, letting other people control my decisions, that was the main reason I left my very unhealthy relationship just over a month ago. Incidentally, it is ironic to me that in the entire time I was with my wife, my mother called me a total of 3 times in 19 years, 3, the rest of the times it was me calling her. Tells me that she did not approve of my relationship, and just never bothered to tell me. Anyway, the reason she called today was to ask me for my address, she wants to send me something. Which is something else she did very little of over the last 19 years. Oh sure, she sent things to the kids on birthdays and Christmas and whatever, usually gift cards though, and as for me, hardly a thing. Anyway, we'll see. I'm not really worried about it, just seems fishy to me. I'm not losing any sleep over it, that's for sure.

I wanted to write this down so I could look at it later, life is really about to change for me, and there is a feeling of loss, but as my favorite saying goes, "There is no loss, only change." I've gone from being co-dependent and downright indecisive and being with a control freak, to being alone and in charge of my life. Someday a woman will come along that can handle both my extreme emotional nature, with ups and downs sometimes switching by the minute, and my overabundant gushiness. She will respect me for what I am, for who I am, even when "I" am a different person at least outwardly from day to day. I have a lot to offer, and it's a shame that people will still judge on the basis of appearance, I've met plenty that still do. I found out that I wasn't compatible with the woman I stayed with for almost 20 years, but in that time I also found out who I WAS compatible with, and that's a whole lot of people. It's just too bad that they all passed me over just because I'm not a "bad boy," because I'm not a cowboy, not country enough, I'm just the nice guy who they want as a friend.  Always they want the big and burly treat them like shit types. All I have to say to that ladies, is, YOUR LOSS!! Oh and this sensitive "really nice" guy has done his share of treating like shit. I mean let's face it, I was the one that left HER, and broke her heart, yeah, real nice. Anyway, all I have to say on this is that somewhere, my lady is out there, and when the universe deems it's time, I will find her. I'm sick of being alone, I want female companionship. Whatever, too bad none are strong enough to stand with me, and not try to control me, I don't need control, I want and need a true equal. Someday maybe...............someday.

April 2, 2010

A job! Finally!

It's official, pending the results of my drug test, which SHOULD be clean, after all, I don't do any drugs, I got a job!

It's at Walmart, as an overnight maintenance worker. Pretty much means cleaning and polishing the floors, and cleaning up the bathrooms and the parking lot. I'm ecstatic to have finally actually landed a job! It's been so long, I don't know what to do with myself. Oh yeah, I know, go to work like everyone else!

Anyway, there's still things pending with the OTHER job opportunity, well one of the other ones. Security clearances are pretty hard to get, if for nothing else than all the info that must be collected. There are some additions that I need to make, and then there's still no guarantee that I'll even GET the clearance, so I may not be able to work for them at all. Then there's the job at Advance Auto Parts that I may be getting a call about next week, but see that's the trouble, I can't take all 3 of these jobs, there just isn't enough of me, or time, to go around, as much as I'd like to work for them all.

So, I suppose if things work out, and I do get that clearance, I'll take that job because of the pay. Although they may elect to keep me anyway, just not on that contract, even if I don't get it. So we'll see. But at least now I do know for sure I got at least one job. I'm so grateful to have been given these opportunities, the universe has truly blessed me. Stay tuned folks for updates on my first day, and just things in general, hopefully when my financial situation improves I will have something else to talk about, LOL!

March 31, 2010

Eggs of a different sort....

I've got a dragon egg! I found this in a post by Bella on Memoirs of a Crazy Witch. You go to the site, and pick yourself a dragon egg to raise, and post it on your blog or other site. See mine over there in the sidebar? Click on it and you'll find the site to get your own. Have fun folks!

March 29, 2010

An update on my job search!! Good news!!

I got some calls today, I may just have a job soon! Check out my post on my other blog, The Stag Warrior Speaks, for all the details!

After so many months of putting in applications, of pounding pavement, and searching and searching, I am finally seeing some results. Now more than ever, I know that my move was for the best. Things are looking up, and I hope to be able to report in the next few days that I am once again gainfully employed.

The energies of this whole situation only fill me with positive vibes, and once again I am reminded of the power of visualization and positive thinking. Good things can and do come if you truly see them happen, and then take the necessary steps to bring those thoughts into reality. I am extremely happy, and I wanted to allow every single one of you to share in my happiness. Have a great day!!

March 23, 2010

I read it in a book

Today my journey through life took me to Barnes and Noble, and to a book called "The Day You Were Born" by Linda Joyce. Now while I didn't have sufficient means to buy the book, I took some time to read the part that had to do with the day that "I" was born. What I found was the most accurate depiction of my inner workings that I have ever read. The book uses numerology and astrology to tell you in depth how you are as a person from just the date of your birth. Not the year, just the month and the day. As many of you know, my date of birth is July 2nd, which makes me a Cancer, and boy, did this book ever go into intricate detail about what makes up a Cancer, what makes them tick. Not only that, but then it gives each sequence of days a description of its own, and by sequence, I mean the numerology sequence of the numbers 1 through 9. I'm not completely sure how it works, but it starts with the first day of the month, with 1, and then goes through the ninth with nine, and I think then the sequence repeats throughout the consecutive days thereafter.

Hopefully I got that right, but the thing I got the most out of reading it was that I myself have some serious internal work to do. It said everything about me that I know to be true. I am eccentric, extreme, and most importantly, when it comes to my internal thoughts, there are no boundaries. It also said that I should learn to manage my fears, something I have NEVER been able to do.

Anyway, to make what I could turn into an extremely long story short, I will just say that I am about to embark on a pretty major internal overhaul. I'm going to make myself some rules, to assure that I create some internal boundaries, and to make myself accountable for what I think and do. I also intend to find who it is I really am during this process, and to start doing things differently than before, not to an extreme as is my norm, but just different. My thoughts have been my undoing for all this time, so it's time to change those thoughts, and become "me".

My life, today

Hello again, and welcome to my life. My new life as a single man. Well at least in living conditions, the paperwork has yet to be filed. It's going on three weeks since I moved out, and the adjustment is proceeding well. I didn't know I would be so petrified at first, having to do things completely on my own. I had become so accustomed to someone always being there to assist me, that I literally didn't know what to do when I finally had the ability to choose things for myself. However, the strings have not yet been fully cut, as, due to my continuing lack of employment, I am still relying on her for financial support. It gives me no pleasure to have to do that, as the whole point of moving out on my own was to have the freedom to do as I want, and not to have to rely on someone else to provide for me. But I am doing well looking for a job, my effort is good. There's still so much I have to do, such as actually get my own place, as for the moment I am relying on a friend to provide me with a roof over my head. That's basically all he and his girlfriend are doing for me, so for the most part, I can consider myself about 70 percent single, on my own.

Why do I go on and on about this? Because for the last 38 years, I have not been single, not in the true sense of the word. Always there has been someone, always doing for me, or somehow providing for my needs, and therefore, I have always had someone I had to "answer" to, always had to consider someone else's needs before my own. Frankly, I got tired of it. So I left. Of course, that wasn't the only motivation behind my move. I have documented on this blog in the past my issues with my wife, mainly the fact that she and I are just not compatible in a romantic relationship. We fought tooth and nail over the simplest of things, and while that in itself isn't unusual, the fact that we have different views on just about everything that is important IS the reason we aren't compatible. Spiritual goals, lifestyle goals, the direction our children's education and location of that education, the list goes on. We agree on very few things. Add to that fact that she is the kind of person that MUST have things go her way or she is impossible to live with, and we find ourselves at the point we are now. About to get a divorce.

There's volumes I could write about how I "feel" about this whole situation, but right now is the time for thinking. I've bogged myself down for too many years worrying about how I was "feeling" about things, and doing very little to actually change them. I can say that this is the right thing that I'm doing, for everyone involved, including my children. They will in the long run have a better life. Sure, they won't see me every day, but they still know that I love them, and that they are taken care of. I don't know what the future holds, but for once I can wake up in the morning and know that whatever I do, I do it because it was my choice, my decision, and not because someone else said I "had" to do it.

With that I will leave you for now, it is late, and there are jobs waiting for me to apply for them when I awake in the morning. Have a good night and day, all you in blogland, and I will report again soon on what has transpired.

March 14, 2010

Apologies, and changes

Greetings to all who follow, and apologies for my month long absence.

Some of you follow my other blog, The Stag Warrior Speaks, so you are aware of my recent happenings, but for the rest of you, my life has taken such a turn that I can truly say I am never going back. I moved out of the house, and am actively searching for a job in my new home about an hour down the road whilst staying with some friends. I've done well in that endeavor after about a week of adjusting to what amounts to a "single" existence, and I don't mind telling you, I was a bit petrified.

I've started my new life, my journey has found a new path, and so too will this blog. I have found that the "story" style of writing has not come to me as often as I would have liked. Therefore, changes are in order. I intend to sleep on it, and make those changes, whatever they may be, in a few days.

Thanks for following, and stay tuned, as I am optimistic about what is to come.

February 9, 2010

Chapter 4: The One

The Stag Warrior awoke to the bright sun in his face, as he did every morning. This morning was a chilly morning, and the ground was covered in a blanket of snow. The last week or so had been pretty brutal in the weather department, as two winter storms had brought frigid temperatures and for the first time in a very long while, had brought snow to the Stag Warrior's path. As a matter of fact, the snow that had fallen last week, causing him to find "indoor" shelter in a cave, had been the deepest snow he had seen since being a child.

This time, the snow was barely enough to cover the ground, as the grass and shrubbery on either side of the path was still visible, so today's journey would not be hampered by the frozen precipitation. He glanced out to the path in front of him, still wiping sleep from his eyes, and saw his usual companions on their paths, going about their lives alongside of his, and knew all was well. Nothing unusual about today, nothing out of the ordinary would happen. Just he and his path, traveling along like everyone else did on their path.

And then, of course, something unusual DID happen.

Another person came to join him on his path, but this person, this woman, she was, well, not like anyone else he had encountered. He clothes flowed around her as she walked, her body so graceful in movement. She had the most beautiful face, brown eyes, dark hair, and the most gorgeous smile. Her arms, her hands, her feet, her entire body seemed to have been constructed from the very exact specifications of his dreams, she was everything he had ever wanted a woman to be. No one else had ever looked to him to be so perfect in form, so precisely crafted as though for him alone. But it wasn't just her looks that intrigued him, it was her mannerisms, her words, oh her words. She had a way of making him feel like royalty, like he deserved to be treated like a king. But it was her that was royalty, and she became his queen. She became his everything.

She thought like him, she talked like him, she seemed to always know when something was bothering him. She seemed to find nothing wrong with him, seeing his "faults" as his best qualities. She adored his voice, his face, his hair most of all. How did he get so lucky? This woman was a goddess, a woman to be revered. His thoughts stayed on her, she was amazing. So many years he had traveled, so many miles, and no one had ever made him feel like this. So much love and adoration, so much passion, the passion of a true goddess. The words evaded him, how to tell her she was so wonderful? How to say "I love you" in words that truly could convey his feelings? The words were just not adequate. All the love in the universe seemed to be concentrated in this one human being, it was just unbelievable. He wanted to wrap himself up in it, to cover them both in it, she made him feel so safe and warm.

All this, and more, now were in his daily thoughts. Feelings of love and passion, togetherness and joy. Every new day brought even more love and even more joy. Her name was on his lips, her face in his mind. "Micaela, I love you", came from his lips even when she couldn't hear it. What a beautiful name, for such an amazing woman. She was the One. She would be his, for forever and a day. And forever is such a deliciously loooooooong time.

January 12, 2010

Chapter 3: Companions

The Stag Warrior peered down his path, the view obscured a bit in the distance, the dust swirling still, as it seemed to do all the time, being lifted and sifted through the trees dotting the edges of the thoroughfare. He had been walking his path for some time now, several weeks in fact. The monotony of the walk had set in, nothing but rock after rock, tree after tree, this section of his journey seemingly stretching on forever with no visible change of the terrain. Ennui had taken over his mind, day after day the same thing, and he began to wonder if this was even worth doing.

About that time when all his mind was dreaming up were thoughts of stopping, thoughts of just sitting down somewhere, making shelter, and staying put, he looked up and what he saw snapped him out of his reverie. There was what appeared to be another path, intersecting his own, and yet also a part of it, as though there were two paths, but one destination. Yes, that was it, a path quite close to his own, parallel to his, and here the two became one. This required some investigation.

Before he had moved three steps further the being appeared. At first only a shadow, as the swirling dust had the effect of providing a sort of shield to normal vision, but then shortly, as he drew closer, he could make out the form of someone quite like himself, yet slightly different. This being was from another town, another tribe perhaps, and was not male. As he approached her, he could see that she had been walking a long time as well, her clothes even more dusty than his, if that were possible, or maybe that was just the dull tan and brown color the attire appeared to be. She wore a waist length denim jacket and jeans, along with hiking boots, and a black bandanna on her head that covered some of her long red and very curly hair. She carried a pack much like his own, a rucksack, except hers was smaller.

There was something familiar about this woman, and a memory he had placed in the back of his mind long ago suddenly came back to him, and as he finally reached her, and saw her face, he knew. It was her. No one else had those grayish green eyes. She had been a friend, a companion, years ago, when he was on a different path, and had traveled with him for a time, and then she was gone. Now she had returned, after so much time, so much distance traveled, her path to join his once again. He was elated! His boredom had vanished, now here was someone who knew, someone who cared, and who would be his companion on this path like she had been on his last.

He talked with her at length, catching up on her individual observances and experiences since they had last traveled together, and as it turned out, she was quite knowledgeable about this path, having traveled it for many years more than he, and she prevailed on him to follow the direction she pointed out. He did so, with her right beside him all the way, and as they walked together, the winds stopped howling and became only a whisper of their former ferocity, and the dust began to settle just a bit, making other paths visible, on either side, parallel to the one they were on, as hers had been.

He began to see more intersections up ahead, where some of those paths crossed theirs, other people were there also, and even behind, why had he not seen them before? He now realized they had been there all along. He had not seen them, or rather ignored them, thinking this path was his alone. There were others walking the path as they were, some faster, some slower, some ahead, some behind, but all going somewhere. Small groups he could see, several people together walking, paths crossing and uncrossing, people coming and going. Everyone on a journey. As they walked others joined them, some old and familiar faces, others new. New friendships were made, and his path became that of many others, some for a short time, as their path took them in another direction, but others stayed, and walked with him as she did. Always guiding him, helping him see the obstacles ahead, always there when he lost his footing, or failed to see a danger ahead.

He began to feel a change in his thinking. This path was not just his. Everyone had a journey of their own, but it did not mean it had to be a lonely one, a solitary one. People were everywhere along the path, there were friends to be made, relationships to forge, for his journey was not just a transition from a starting point to some obscure destination far away, it was and is an experience of humanity. It was now a joy to wake up, see the sun rise, and greet the day knowing there were others on the same road as he, tackling the same obstacles, dealing with the same storms. Companions were always available. One just had to look up and see them, greet them, and invite them to walk along for as long as they were able.

No one man, no one person, was ever truly alone.

January 8, 2010

New blog

Hello there, just wanted to let everyone know that I have decided to start a new blog. I intend to use this one for only my "chapter" posts, and my new one for everything else. The new one is called "The Stag Warrior Speaks". I've written the first post over there already, so please, feel free to click the link and go check it out.

Thanks and have a great evening.

January 6, 2010

Chapter 3 is coming, and a thank you

Just a quick note tonight to let everyone know that Chapter 3 of The Stag Warrior's journey is in the works, and should be "on paper" in a few days time. I have been meaning to write something to let everyone know that the saga will continue, but as you'll see below, I have new incentive to write it. It's been a learning experience and one of deep inner contemplation at times. I learn from myself as I write, more each time, about who and what I am, and who and what I wish to become. My life in the "real" world is no different than that of anyone else, but I find that writing that way helps me to focus, and to process my thoughts in a more imaginative way. Imagination and visualization go hand in hand, and if it can be imagined, it CAN be done.

I got the surprise of my life yesterday morning reading "Turn-around Tuesdays" at The Soccer Mom's Guide to Wicca. Fae had posted an entry about the first two chapters of my saga, but that wasn't the surprise, as she had informed me in advance. She gave me the biggest compliments in her descriptions of me and my blog, and Fae, all I can say is, thank you so much for making my day with your kind words. I am "a quite talented writer"?  Wow! You have made The Stag Warrior's journey, on this day, just that much brighter. Thanks again.

And for anyone who has not checked out Fae and Juniper's blog, please do, they are both TRUE talented writers, and have a lot to offer. Just click the link above and it will take you to their home page.

Blessings to all of you on YOUR journey!