What a day

Today was a great day. Tiring, but a great day.

I helped a friend and his girlfriend move into their new home today.

It’s a great little house here in middle TN, and it had some very happy vibes, but they felt……….different. I don’t know if I’ve mentioned it before, but I’m highly empathic, and this house had some very strong emotional imprints. It felt like there had been a child in the house, and of course grownups, but the vibes were a little confusing to me, the happy was overlapped with worry, a strange sensation.

The move went pretty fast, they only needed a 14 ft Uhaul truck since they don’t have a lot of furniture, well they did, but they got rid of a lot before the move anticipating buying new stuff for the new house.

A queen bed, a futon, a couple of bookshelves, standard stuff. Most of the truck was filled, but we loaded and unloaded with no real issues.

I rode back to the old house with his girlfriend since she had to go to work (and of course my car was at their old house), work being at her computer taking customer service calls for Comcast. Yeah, the person you talk to when your cable internet doesn’t work. He or she is probably just like Cristal, working from home. (shhhhhh)

She had to log into, and open up app after app, probably 6 or 7 of them, before she could take the first call. Looked really confusing, but after watching her for a few calls, it seemed pretty simple. You know how the person always asks you to verify your social security number when you call? Asks for the last 4? I’ve always had this worry that they knew my whole number, all 9 digits, but now that I’ve seen it from their end I can say that the last 4 is all they can see.

Well after watching her do that for a bit, we went looking for her cat, which was under the house (a singlewide trailer), gave her a bath, and a little while later I went home.

Oh but what I wanted to say about the vibes! While riding back I asked her if the previous owners had any kids, and she said yeah, one, but that he had Down’s syndrome or something. So maybe that’s why the vibes felt like they did to me. It was awesome to hear that. Since I started on my pagan path, I’ve been learning to feel the energies and emotions around me better, just letting it happen, trying less hard, and the results I’m getting are really making me feel great.

I would be interested in hearing about any thoughts or ideas on this, there is so much more out there than can be detected with the “normal” senses, and I can’t wait to see what other experiences await me!

Technorati Tags: moving,vibes

Musings

I've been on my pagan path only a few months now, and I have never been more content with the direction my spiritual life is going. I have connected to energies and entities I had never considered to exist, and learned about many others I have yet to experience.

I am still overwhelmed with the amount of information out there, and also that I never saw any of it before. I feel like I must have been in a hole somewhere to have not seen it, but I guess it was just because I didn't choose to pay attention, really "see" what was around me.

They say that when the student is ready, the teacher appears, and I used to think the "teacher" meant someone human. Boy, was I ever wrong! I've seen so many things recently that became my teachers, pulling or pushing me to look at something, hear something, just pay attention to the lessons I need to learn. 

Animals that just "show up" right when I go outside to sit on the patio, take a long hard look at me, and then leave. (I've seen this one toad, well I think it's the same one, like 3 times)

Dreams I've had, visions even, deities appearing with something to "say". (So far I've had two such visions, nary a spoken word in either)


Blog posts, or pages on the internet, that just magically "appear" when it's the very thing I needed to read. (This has already happened more times than I can count)

People I meet, yeah there have been some teachers of the human variety too, even people I meet seemingly in passing, that do nothing else but to brighten my day and know they were there for that reason.

So I'm learning a lot, slowing down, quieting my mind being one of the main things. Compassion for all of nature, big or small, paying attention to seeming coincidence, listening to my heart.


I can't wait to see what's in store for me next!




 

A Man's Perspective on a Woman's Issue

I have been reading a lot of women's blogs. Hell, most of the blogs I read are authored by women. I love to read them, to see the female perspective on life as a pagan, to read about their children, and basically how they feel about just about anything.


I wish I had the right words to explain my thoughts sometimes. I am physically a man, and much of my thought process is very "male", as one would imagine. But part of me, my inner workings, have a very "female" aspect to them, probably because I am a "triple water". You see, my Sun sign is Cancer, my moon sign is Scorpio, and my rising sign is Pisces. So, I am by nature a very "mothering" and nurturing person, when I'm not going to the opposite extreme and being a selfish egotistical maniac.


Having said that, I want to talk about something that no amount of "female" brain can help me to understand. I have seen quite a few posts about this subject, and the spiritual aspects of it, on several blogs I have read over the last few days, and I started wondering why I kept seeing it so often, so much so that I started thinking of writing this post about it.



It is known by many names: a cycle, a period, menstruation, and my personal favorite, moon time. Regardless of the name, to me, I just have no frame of reference to understand it. I don't have the hardware physically, and mentally, I just don't know how to describe how I feel about it.


Most of my life I never really thought about it, I knew women had it, but did I think that physically AND emotionally it's a really different time for them? No, of course not. How could I know? A period, being something spiritual, what?

Usually my spoken words and my mental dialogue would go something like this:



"Oh I see, it's that time of the month, I'll leave you alone". (Well, not necessarily, I've gotten my "red wings" before). "I feel for you, it's so unfair to women". ("Things like that make me GLAD I'm a man!") "Your stomach is hurting? Cramps, huh? I wish there was something I could do." (Man, I am SO glad I'm a man!)


Now don't get me wrong, I really do sympathize, but like I said before, without a common frame of reference, how can I or any other man really feel for a woman? What about women who can no longer have children, and still have moon time? How is that fair? What about our daughters, how does it make them feel when they first start, and are years away from even thinking about having children?



Reading all the blog entries I've seen about the spiritual aspects of menstruation has made me take a second look at how I see it, especially as a father of girls. Yesterday my eldest started, (in retrospect possibly the reason I've been seeing so much about it lately, a harbinger of things to come) a year and a half after her younger sister, and they both have had completely different mindsets about it. Liz (the eldest) didn't want to start, didn't want to have to deal with it. Alex, especially in the last 6 months or so, has been obsessed with everything about sex and childbearing, and in the beginning, accepted it as just another part of life. What's a father to do? I can't tell them how it feels, what emotional changes there may be, I mean, I can tell them the physical aspects of why it happens, but anything else, I'm clueless.


Sometimes I wish that for only one day, I don't know, maybe a month or two, I could BE a woman, if only to feel how it is to be one. To really FEEL the sensation of moon time, to feel what it's like to be pregnant, to have another life inside of me, but I doubt very seriously that will ever happen, so I guess I'll never know. But I do know this, I don't think I will ever see women the same again. To have a cradle of creation in your bodies, I envy you. I respect you. And I do feel for you, I feel your pain as much as I am able, and hope that those women that do read this know that this man is seeing you now for how sacred you really are.